From our agony aunt’s mailbag:
Dear Alma,
This happens every year.
Beginning of December, the principal bassoon asks where I’m gonna be for Christmas.
At home, I say.
Alone? he checks.
When I nod he says, So am I. Why don’t we do it together?
This has been going on seven or eight years, ever since he got divorced. We have Christmas dinner together, drink too much and wind up in bed. I don’t love him, don’t even like him that much to be honest, but it’s no fun being alone at the holidays so we do the whole thing again on New Year’s Eve. Arriving for the first rehearsal of the year, we nod to each other like distant acquaintances.
Don’t get me wrong, Alma. I’m happy with my own company. I have a sister with kids in California who’d be happy to have me over for the holidays but I prefer to unwind on my own. The only thing that stops me going away is feeling sorry for this needy bassoonist, a nice man with nowhere to go.
What should I tell him next year?
Dinner for two
Dear Dinner for two,
Seems like you don’t mind having a couple of rolls in the hay with this guy. There is no need to “love” someone or even “like them very much” if you just want to get a little one-on-one exercise between the sheets. Neither of you is getting the short stick here but it does feel pretty boring. On the other hand, there doesn’t appear to be another option which appeals to you more.
It all has the aura of apathetic, or copacetic, or whatever. It would be easy to test out a different option and see how you feel. Try telling him you are busy for Christmas and go visit your sister. Or book a vacation for yourself and look for a new sexy buddy. If you find yourself craving a little home-town bassoon, you can always fall back on New Years, MLK Day, Lunar New Year, and Groundhog Day, all of which are before February 14, Valentine’s Day.
Questions for Alma? Please put them in the comments section or send to DearAlmaQuery@gmail.com
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