From our agony aunt’s mailbag:
Dear Alma,
My standpartner is an ardent supporter of Donald Trump. He is constantly bringing up politics, even though he is aware that I don’t share his views in the slightest. I try to politely smile and not respond, but it’s gotten so that I feel physically ill as rehearsals approach. Last week he even showed up with a Trump tshirt on under his button-down shirt, and revealed it once he was sitting down. He makes under the breath comments constantly – derogatory and slanderous comments towards democrats. I am going out of my mind. Alma – is it wrong to push back – to wear a Kamala shirt? I feel pushed down and bullied. And I am sick of it.
Signed,
Had enough
Dear Had Enough,
I get it. He is incessantly talking about something that causes stress in the work environment, resulting in decreased productivity and increased anxiety for those around him.
How can it stop? How can calm and order be restored? Let’s look at several things that may be causing this, possible solutions, and things to be cautious of going forward.
I know it’s no excuse, but some people are just completely out of it. They aren’t aware of how their behaviors and words affect others. Be clear and tell him you do not want to discuss or hear about politics at work. If he brings it up again, be even more direct – “I do not want to talk about or hear about politics at work.” Don’t worry about offending him. Be straight forward and clear.
Has it occurred to you that he may be purposefully trying to sabotage you? To get a reaction so that he can complain to management? Don’t bite at this low hanging fruit. Stay your course, don’t respond to his provocations. Some people are inherently terrible – narcissistic and manipulative. Stay aware and protect yourself from this dangerous taunting.
Keep documentation of his offenses, dates and details, including the times when you asked him to stop talking about this topic. You may need this proof if things get more heated and you are called in to discuss the situation with management.
Had Enough, do you feel as if you are being harassed? Does your orchestra have any harassment or behavior code documents- best practices or expected conduct? If your race, gender or religion is being degraded, you may have protection from your employer.
In the short term, ask for a seat change. The quicker you can get away from this toxic maniac the better.
Be smart, remain cool, take a step back and a big breath. There are times to take the bait, but this is not one of them.
Questions for Alma? Please put them in the comments section or send to DearAlmaQuery@gmail.com
The post Dear Alma, My stand partner shoves Trump in my face appeared first on Slippedisc.
